Iris- A Tobias Monologue/Songfic
by hebrewhernia
Summary: Ummm. I got book 54 and read it and there's gonna be a lot of fics coming lately-- including a few like this. This is a sad romancey fic to the song "Iris" by the Goo Goo Dolls (who are almost as kewl as Lifehouse). It's a great song. Expect some more fic


  
  
~~Tobias POV~~  
I flew up above a city, thinking of Rachel. The notes of a song drifted up to my excellent hawk ears on the wind, played on a radio somewhere.  
  
"And I'd give up forever to touch you  
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow  
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be  
And I don't want to go home right now"  
  
And I missed Rachel even more. I had wanted to grow up with her, maybe even marry her,have a home with her, but it could never happen now. Rachel was dead. And I would never have a home with her.  
  
"And all I can taste is this moment  
And all I can breathe is your life  
'Cause sooner or later it's over  
I just don't want to miss you tonight"  
  
I remembered the moment before the Controller with the polar bear morph killed her. She turned to the screen and said, "I love you." I held onto that phrase, those 3 small words, when I missed her the most. She loved me.   
  
  
"And I don't want the world to see me  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am"  
  
Hearing those lyrics made me even sadder. I remembered how I felt when Rachel, when she died. I didn't want to be seen, be assaulted by media, so I flew away. They didn't understand that someone had finally, finally loved me, and now she's gone. Someone finally loved me, and then was taken away, snatched away. I would have cried, but hawks can't. That's why I morphed human in those last few seconds of her life.   
  
"And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming  
Or the moment of truth in your lies  
When everything feels like the movies  
And you bleed just to know you're alive"  
  
I would have cried, but hawks can't. That's why I morphed human in those last few seconds of her life. For Rachel, and so I could cry. And the song was right. Everything felt like the movies. Or a soap opera, like Ax used to watch during the war on his TV. A really bad, cheesy soap opera.   
  
"And I don't want the world to see me  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am  
  
And I don't want the world to see me  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am  
  
And I don't want the world to see me  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am"  
  
So now I was hiding from the media, from everyone. They wouldn't understand me. Nobody ever had, really, except Ax and Rachel. And now they were both gone. They left my life, deserted me. Just like everyone else. Just like everyone else.   
  
"I just want you to know who I am"  
  
I wanted Rachel to know who I am, who I was, but Rachel was gone. I would never hear her bravery, her battle cry of 'let's do it!' ever again. I would never, in human morph, hug her, or kiss her, ever, now. She had left me, the only one to ever really know who I was, who I am.  
  
"I just want you to know who I am"  
  
I wanted Ax to know who I was, who I am, but he's gone too. Fighting wars in far-off parts of the galaxy.He sort of knew me, sort of knows me. But he left me, just like anyone else who ever cared.   
  
"I just want you to know who I am"  
  
They couldn't help it, couldn't help leaving, but it still hurt. It still hurt just as bad. Every bit as bad. I would never see my twisted relative, the uncle who cared,or my gung-ho girlfriend, if she was my girlfriend, ever again.  
  
A/N: I almost cried while writing this. Did you almost cry or actually cry while reading it? Tell me. I'll consider myself a good author if I can make someone cry with a sad story. Not that I like making people cry, but some really good authors have made me cry. I wrote this at like 10:50 pm tonight, and it took me all of maybe 20 minutes. I couldn't sleep. Now I think I'm ready to go to bed. Good night all. Or day. Whatever. Buhbyezz...  
  
  
  



End file.
